Category Archives: My Life

If the Weather is Nice You Should See What is Going On Outside

“What people call serendipity sometimes is just having your eyes open.”

–Jose Manuel Barroso

I realize I have been spending way too much time indoors and sitting at my computer over the past few months. I do venture out to walk to the car and drive places but I haven’t been walking around outside. I think I have been avoiding my front yard because it embarrasses me. It is currently a big weed patch. We need to get the landscaping done.

Today I did venture out to the car to load up some supplies I use for tutoring. I was busy deciding where to put my new rolling carry all when I noticed a teenager making his way across my front yard near my front walkway. At first I thought he was about to leave one of those random advertisements on my door. Like the ones for yard work. I was a bit suspicious of his intentions I must say. He saw me looking at him quizzically and said, ” Is this your property?” I said yes and then he told me not to worry because he was participating in a “water gun tournament” and that he was trying to hide and surprise one of his fellow tournamenters. I watched as he finished crossing my yard and told him it was ok as long as he didn’t squirt me. He laughed at that.

I thought this was the end of my interaction with the local teenagers when I spied another one squatting down, with a water gun, between my neighbor’s house and mine. This was getting to be really fun. I said to him that I had no idea this was going on around here. He said they had to catch other kids coming from their houses to their cars. I asked if they did windows. He said, ” Do you mean they need to be washed?” I said yes and that got a little laugh from him as well.

It was a happy encounter and I realized I need to get outside in the front of my house more often. Just look at all the interesting things I am missing out on.

SOCS Saturday-Attach or Attachment with a few Synonyms

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Another word that means attach is connect. I have been having some issues with joints and muscles in the past few weeks and this old song came to mind.

“Toe bone connected to the foot bone

Foot bone connected to the heal bone

Heel bone connected to the ankle bone

Ankle bone connected to the shin bone

Shin bone connected to the knee bone

Knee bone connected to the thigh bone

Thigh bone connected to the hip bone

Hip bone connected to the back bone

Back bone connected to the shoulder bone

Shoulder bone connected to the neck bone

Neck bone connected to the head bone…

Dem bones, dem bones gonna walk around

Dem bones, dem bones gonna walk around

Dem bones, dem bones gonna walk around

Now hear the word of the Lord.”

from “Dem Bones” by James Weldon Johnson (1871-1938)

I can personally attest to the fact that I have felt the connections of some of these bones lately.

Via Weirdo Video on You Tube:

I have felt a hitch in my step

and have tended to hobble a bit

This has tied me up somewhat

but I intend to hang on until I

get through this.

“Carry on,

Love is coming,

Love is coming to us all.”

“Carry On” via Joseph E. Pettry Gregory on You Tube:

My husband surprised me this morning with a Valentine’s gift. He is one attachment I want to keep. ❤ ❤ ❤

|Lindaghill|

Stream of Consciousness Saturday-Opposite Emotions

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Battery Low, Need to Plug into Energy Source to Recharge

When things get to me

It is a kind of draining

Like when you see the battery indicator on your cell phone

Showing the charge is getting low

My energy level goes down along with my spirits

Feeling low

Have to allow time to recover and get recharged.

The Opposite of Low is Elation or Passion

I wrote this on a prior post:

Too Passionate

I think there is a passionate temperament. A person that can feel so strongly. There have been many times when I have been standing upon my soapbox and declaring my opinion about something I found wrong in the world.

During those times of strong emotion I have noted others looking on calmly, almost disinterested. I have thought to myself how can they not feel anything about this? How can anyone not feel strongly about this ? How can people feel so dispassionately about things? It is like they are already dead.

I realized that I was different.

It is not just passionate indignation that I feel. When you have the capacity for strong feelings you can feel great joy and elation as well. Like when you see something you find beautiful or hear music that you love.

I am glad I am different if it means to feel deeply and be more aware in the world. Maybe this is why I always wanted to stand up for people’s right to be different. To be who they truly are.

Have you ever felt different or been told you are different?

Some people are sensitive.

“The truly creative mind in any field is no more than this:

A human creature born abnormally, inhumanly sensitive.

To him…a touch is a blow,

a sound is a noise,

a misfortune is a tragedy,

a joy is an ecstasy,

a friend is a lover,

a lover is a god,

and failure is death.”–Pearl S. Buck

Beautiful Voice: Renee Fleming sings Song to the Moon by Dvorak via Mr.Frais on You Tube:

|Lindaghill|

|Loveisindablog|

Winter is a Time for Reflection

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I have been thinking about this recently. That I am going to take a break from my blog. My temperament is such that I normally do not like to talk a lot and make small talk. Blogging feels like making a lot of small talk to me. And I have picked up on a mean tone to it. I wrote about it in by blog about the grammar police.

I read something about Winter. That it is a time to slow down, go inward and reflect. I am ready to do that.

Blogging has been an experiment for me to see if I like writing and have any ability. I do think I have some ability. Right now I do not like having it dominate my life. I find that I do not like doing it to this extent. So frequently and so much.

I may drop in and read others blogs, comment and post again myself. Not sure just now.

Glad to meet some other friendly bloggers and appreciate the kind comments some of you have made about my posts. I appreciate the support of my friends and family as well.

We Need To Be Dreamers

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We are the music-makers,
And we are the dreamers of dreams,
Wandering by lone sea-breakers,
And sitting by desolate streams.
World-losers and world-forsakers,
Upon whom the pale moon gleams;
Yet we are the movers and shakers,
Of the world forever, it seems.”

–Arthur O’Shaughnessy

We have to have dreams and believe in possibilities if there is ever to be human progress. It is so easy to get discouraged and bogged down with all the problems in the world. Thinking that things will never change or will always be bad.

There is always the possibility of new discoveries and that the world can improve.

“TO BE HOPEFUL in bad times is not just foolishly romantic. It is based on the fact that human history is a history not only of cruelty, but also of compassion, sacrifice, courage, kindness.
What we choose to emphasize in this complex history will determine our lives. If we see only the worst, it destroys our capacity to do something. If we remember those times and places—and there are so many—where people have behaved magnificently, this gives us the energy to act, and at least the possibility of sending this spinning top of a world in a different direction.
And if we do act, in however small a way, we don’t have to wait for some grand utopian future. The future is an infinite succession of presents, and to live now as we think human beings should live, in defiance of all that is bad around us, is itself a marvelous victory.”

–Howard Zinn

I want to read over and over all the hopeful and encouraging words of all the dreamers and visionaries. It buoys me up and helps me to believe in life and the future of the world.

Let’s act in small positive ways and not give in to the darkness.

|Katgotyourtongue|

One Elephant Seal and the Central California Coast

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I went on a spur of the moment trip and met my daughter in Cambria this past Sunday. It was a little over 3 hours drive about 200 miles north of where I live. The drive up was gorgeous. The most beautiful scenery starts above Ventura where the highway runs along the ocean. The day was sunny with moderate temperatures and the ocean appeared calm and blue. You get a beautiful view of the ocean up to Santa Barbara. Then again above Santa Barbara where you start getting more open countryside. Everything is still green. Up into Solvang there are rolling hills and oak trees. Above there around Los Alamos you start seeing vineyards. The vines are dormant now for the winter. Then you swing by some ocean communities again like Pismo Beach. Onward to San Luis Obispo and you connect with Highway 1 and head toward Morro Bay. Highway 1 then runs along the ocean up to Cambria.

I met my daughter at a restaurant called the Indigo Moon for lunch. She had driven down about 3 ½ hours from Northern California. There is a lovely beach in Cambria called Moonstone Beach. There is a wooden walkway on the bluffs and we took a walk there before sunset and had dinner at a restaurant above the beach. There are many inns along Moonstone Beach and we could see some people sitting out on the balconies.

Moonstone Beach by Snowfalcon on wikipedia

The next day ,after a delicious breakfast at a local diner called the Cambria Cafe ,we drove a bit further north to San Simeon. The Hearst Castle is located atop the hills here. We did not go to Hearst Castle but I have toured it in the past. The Hearst family owned many acres of land around the castle. My daughter and I said how glad we are that they gave the bulk of the land to a nature conservancy so it will not be developed. What a gift to have all this open land preserved. We went to the beach at San Simeon for more gorgeous views and saw an elephant seal sun bathing on the beach, (photo above). There were signs posted about the elephant seals stating they are a protected species. The signs warned not to approach them too close. It recommended staying back about 50-100 feet from them.

When we first saw the elephant seal I was worried it was sick, injured or worse because it was laying so still. Then it opened its eyes, looked around and, as we walked over to look, started to roll over and yawn.

It had a snout, that looked like a short elephant trunk, called a proboscis. I spied a couple of pointy teeth in its lower jaw. I thought it was a young male because of its size. It had some open wounds around its neck. I told my daughter that maybe it had gotten in a fight with an older male and been driven off. A park ranger later confirmed it was a male probably about 5 years old.

My daughter and I did a little hiking along the beach and on the bluffs above. It was so beautiful with clear blue skies and sunshine that reflected off the water. We saw a few monarch butterflies among the eucalyptus trees above the beach. The eucalyptus were so fragrant as we walked along and stepped on their fallen leaves and acorns. The Eucalyptus tree is not native to California. It was brought to California in the 1850s during the California Gold Rush from Australia.

We said goodbye in the early afternoon to make our drives in opposite directions. This trip made me realize I need to do this more often. Get out and see the beauty that is so close and is the California coast.

Elephant Seals at Piedras Blancas, California via wikipedia

|Jusjojan|

Free Time

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“I really think I write about everyday life. I don’t think I’m quite as odd as others say I am. Life is intrinsically, well, boring and dangerous at the same time. At any given moment the floor may open up. Of course, it almost never does; that’s what makes it so boring.”

–Edward Gorey

I really like Edward Gorey’s illustrations. I am most familiar with the ones he did for PBS Mystery. I want to read his books. Reading about him makes me smile. He used funny pen names that were a play on his name like Ogdred Weary and Dogear Wryde. If someone so wonderfully creative could say that he was bored sometimes I think I am in great company.

It has been hard being semi-retired. But I realize, at the least in recent years when I worked full-time, I spent my life doing a lot of work that just kept me distracted and busy. It used up a good part of my life. Now that I have been rudely excluded from that work I am at a loss. With a bit too much free time. What to do with it. The problem is that my prior jobs and parenthood structured my existence for me and I now I have to structure my own.

People can say go get busy. Do volunteer work. Devote yourself to service. A lot of my life has been taken up taking care of other people already. I am doing some volunteer work and tutoring part-time but that is not enough. I think I must find work or an activity that is truly engaging for me not just busy making or a distraction.

“A lot of impulsive mistakes are made by people who simply aren’t willing to stay bored a little longer.”
― Paul Aurandt

Not a good idea just to jump into the first thing that comes along.

I mentioned PBS Mystery. We do not have cable and I do not watch a lot of television. But I do enjoy PBS Mystery. I have written before that I have really enjoyed Endeavor and the Wallander series. Masterpiece is another PBS production I really like. I am still watching Downton Abbey although I think the earlier seasons were the best. I like Call the Midwife as well. It is great learning about Nurses in England who were midwives and made home visits.

I am glad that I do not have regular television service here because I can see how I might end up sitting in front of it watching a bunch of garbage to fill the time. So from what I have seen of Reality TV, I don’t think it is for me. Especially The Housewives of You Fill in the Blank.

|Katgotyourtongue|

Stream of Consciousness Saturday-To Heal

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“Some people see scars, and it is wounding they remember. To me they are proof of the fact that there is healing.”
― Linda Hogan

There are many synonyms for the word heal. Recover, be out of the woods, get back on your feet, bounce back, feel oneself again, pull through, and restore, are some. I have felt wonder and gratitude for my body’s ability to heal. There is nothing better, after having a bought of illness, than to feel myself gaining strength and feeling good again.

I have had some major challenges to my health and had to undergo major surgery two times and literally gone off a cliff in a car. So I have some good examples of our body’s ability to heal. I feel vulnerable writing about this because I do not want to be seen as damaged. I know people turn away from those of us who have had cancer.

I underwent major surgery for lung cancer two times in a 4 year period. In between those times my husband and I were in a major car accident which could have easily killed us both. I was terribly wrenched and bruised with 3 broken ribs from that accident. Each time I underwent surgery I was very frightened. Even though or maybe because I was a Nurse my fears were magnified. One brother-in-law, who is a MD, told me after the first surgery that this type of surgery is one of the most brutal and worse than cardiac bypass because of what they do to the body during the surgery. I am glad he did not tell me this before I went into surgery. I remember asking one of my RN friends about how they operate on the lung when you are breathing. I was not familiar with how the surgery was done and she worked in ICU and knew about these surgeries. She told me they put a tube in your windpipe and collapse the lung before they start. The recovery from this type of surgery is rough. But even a few days after I felt my strength and would get up by myself in the hospital at night to go to the bathroom.

About 4 years later, after the second surgery, there were several wild fires in the LA area. The location of one of the fires was not too far from the hospital I was in. During the second night, after surgery, I could smell the smoke coming into my room through an air vent. I thought this is so great for someone who has just undergone lung cancer surgery. I asked if something could be done. They could not move me or get ahold of anyone in engineering. Hospital beds are on wheels. So I got up and moved my own bed away from the vent.

The recovery from the second surgery was harder as I had been told it would be. I think part of that was my stomach does not tolerate pain medication. I really needed the medication but it wrecked my stomach and I ended up with trouble sleeping not only because of pain but because of terrible heart burn.

But I did recover from both of these surgeries. My body healed.

I do not have to go through major surgery to appreciate my body’s ability to heal. I do appreciate it even when it heals from minor illnesses and injuries. It is a kind of miraculous thing this great strength and ability to heal with which we are born.

My husband has pointed out to me that the visible scars of my lung surgeries have faded quite a bit. Another demonstration of the body’s healing powers.

|LindaGHill|

Kat Got Your Tongue Challenge-Sleep

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“Also, I could finally sleep. And this was the real gift, because when you cannot sleep, you cannot get yourself out of the ditch–there’s not a chance.” –Elizabeth Gilbert

The Greek god of sleep is Hypnos. It was said that near his cave were poppies and other hypnotic plants. His mother was Nyx the goddess of the night. Do you remember in the Wizard of Oz when the wicked witch put Dorothy and her friends to sleep with a field of poppies? Opium is a narcotic made from the Opium poppy.

I am a “light” sleeper and I am easily disturbed by my husband if he has a restless night or is stressed over something and not sleeping well. When my children were little I slept with my senses on alert to any disturbance coming from their rooms. I wake up if there is an earthquake. My husband, once he was asleep, could sleep through the kids crying and earthquakes.

Menopause made me more sensitive to stress and insomnia. For many years I think I had a sleep disorder and seldom got a good night’s sleep. There were periods where I would go through cycles of insomnia with a few nights of normal in between.

Thankfully, I have been improving in this area lately. I attribute it to the fact that my hormones are stable and I am no longer under a lot of stress with my work or life. My children are grown and out of the house. I am sleeping better.

I have not gotten to the stage of taking my improved sleeping pattern for granted. I can still feel gratitude for sleeping well.

It can be a vicious cycle if I have poor quality sleep. It leads to decreased ability to cope with stress. Then the increase stress leads to another night of poor sleep. I have read that not getting adequate sleep can cause us to have trouble maintaining a healthy weight. It can lead to obesity. I have had trouble with losing weight as well.

So I will have to see if this theory holds true. If I continue to sleep well and lose weight that would be great.

Now when I occasionally have difficulty staying asleep I do not fight it but get up or turn on a light and read for a while. Eventually I become drowsy again and can get back to sleep.

Do you have a remedy for insomnia? What do you do if you have trouble sleeping?

|KatGotYourTongue|

Making Connections with Social Media

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Are we more connected with social media? Facebook is great at reminding me of people’s birthdays and I get to be a voyeur into their lives when they share photos of their latest activities, partners, children, grandchildren or pets. Really I do appreciate being reminded of someone’s birthday because I am very bad at remembering other than my immediate family. At least I can see that people are still alive when I see their photos. I can wish them Happy Birthday on the right day. I like congratulating them on their achievements if they choose to share. I can click on “like” or make a comment. But do I feel closer to them? Not really. It is a pseudo closeness.

I resisted Email at first because I felt that it was not a good substitute for letters or phone calls. Then I succumbed to using it because it was a practical way to keep in touch with a distant family member and my daughter when she was in college.

Now the latest form of communication I have adopted is texting. I can see the practicality of texting when I am running around doing a lot and need to quickly remind someone to pick something up at the market or that I am running late. But as an exclusive form of communication, or to check in and say hello, texting is not the best. It is better than nothing and I can use it to make dates to really get together in person or have a phone talk. If it is just having a conversation in abbreviations, I find I can not really get much of a sense of the person I am texting with. With blogging, texting, tweeting or posting on Facebook we do not get the total picture of the person even if we get a photo. What I mean by this is we do not get the body language and facial expression or tone of voice that communicates so much about what is really going on with someone else. We get a few sentences and maybe some emoticons.

We really need to slow down and talk with each other don’t we in order to maintain any real relationship? Do you feel Facebook and texting or tweeting helps to maintain your relationships? Or are you wanting something more? Do you find it distracting and superficial? Like making electronic small talk?

The need to be texting or reading our Facebook page or checking out what is posted on WordPress is a way to entertain ourselves and keep from being bored or lonely but at what cost? It has an addictive quality like playing a video game. It is momentarily distracting and entertaining. It does not make a demand on us to think about much but the most superficial things. Besides affecting the quality of our relationships I would say it eats up a lot of time we could be using for something more meaningful.

If we let ourselves be controlled by social media it will impact the quality of our lives and what kind of society we live in. If we let ourselves be constantly seduced and distracted by social media it could keep us from fully living our lives. Do you try to balance the time you spend on social media with other activities? Do you make a special effort to un-plug? Do you think it is a good idea to make certain times off-limits to social media or texting like during dinner with your family/kids?

Here is an interesting TED talk on this issue:

Sherry Turkle TED talk Alone Together