I spotted an uplifting post on the front page of the Huffington Post that was written by a Yogi, V.K. Harber, who has her own studio in Tacoma, Washington. She brought up so many good points about how we all have these unrealistic ideas about the ideal body. And we all do not have to have the perfect body to benefit from yoga. She says it is just the opposite. That most of us do not have the perfect body and that is ok.
I relate to what she is saying. I have been looking for a yoga class that is not “aerobic yoga”, which is my label for competitive, highly challenging and painful. Part of me wants to say, ” no pain, no gain” and tell myself go ahead and aim for that perfect body image. Whip myself into a thin, muscular me. But I think that it just not realistic and I do need to accept that I am not going to look like the popular, health magazine image. (I love the photos, shared by Ms. Harber, of everyday folks doing yoga.)
But that should not stop me from doing some gentle, restorative yoga. I used to do a pretty mean warrior pose.
“Those who cannot remember the past are condemned to repeat it”
–George Santayana
I have been discouraged at times when I read that some women today think it is a negative thing to be a feminist. I have thought about writing more about it. Just recently my husband’s aunt sent me some historical photos that inspired me to write this post.
It is important for young women today to be aware of the history of women’s rights in the United States. We didn’t have the right to vote until 1920. Women struggled for many years to win that right. When our country was founded women did not have the right to own property.
When the Women’s Liberation Movement started women were blocked from all kinds of jobs considered only suitable for men. There were very few women doctors or lawyers. Women were not even allowed to run in the Boston Marathon. Here is some biographical info, from her website, on Kathrine Switzer the first woman to run in the Boston Marathon who the officials at that time tried to drag off the race course. “ Kathrine Switzer will always be best known as the woman who, in 1967, challenged the all-male tradition of the Boston Marathon and became the first woman to officially enter and run the event. Her entry created an uproar and worldwide notoriety when a race official tried to forcibly remove her from the competition. The photo of this confrontation flashed around the world.” Can you imagine that, it makes me nauseated, an official tried to drag her off the race course. It was during and after the 70s that we had the first women astronauts, more women in medical and law school, and women in leadership positions in business and politics. None of this would have happened without this struggle.
During this time of the Women’s Lib Movement, some women refused to wear bras and would burn bras during demonstrations. This was because bras were thought of as uncomfortable male inventions to make women’s breasts attractive to men. That is how the feminists were labeled “bra burners.” Women started to learn about their own bodies, some learned to do their own pelvic exams, and to request plastic speculums which were not as hard and cold as metal ones. Women asked to keep their feet down on the exam table instead of propped high up in uncomfortable metal stirrups. Women wanted to give birth on comfortable beds, or in water instead of in a surgical style delivery room with their feet in those metal stirrups.
I read about women’s history in my American History class in college and remember what an eye opener it was and how I admired so much the suffragettes and other women pioneers for freedom. One was Elizabeth Blackwell who was the first American woman MD. When she applied to medical school the dean and faculty put her application up to a vote by the other 150 male students. They thought it was joke and voted to accept her.
I read the book Feminine Mystique by Betty Friedan and Sexual Politics by Germaine Greer. Betty Friedan talked about how women in the 50s who, although college educated, were encouraged to stay at home in the suburbs and were finding something missing from their lives, (like intellectual stimulation). Women started to question these prescribed roles they were assigned to.
I am grateful that as a young woman I was exposed to these ideas and had women leaders to look up to like Gloria Steinem. Many people may not know that Gloria Steinem once had a job as a Playboy Bunny. She did an undercover assignment, as a reporter, at a Playboy Club in New York. There was later a movie made about this episode in her life. She is quoted in an article in the New York Times that at that time, when she did this reporting, she was not yet aware of her feminism. Playboy was a popular magazine for young men and the Playboy Club was very popular. The “bunnies” ,(waitresses), wore these low cut costumes, high cut at the bottom, with bunny ears, a puffy white tail and high heels. These were some of the role models women had then. Films usually portrayed women in very confined roles as well. A popular film in the 60s was Goldfinger which introduced the “The Bond Girls.” It is now known that the writer, Ian Fleming , of the James Bond series was a misogynist. But when the first movies came out the James Bond character was very popular. James Bond is portrayed as less sexist in recent years. I remember seeing the movie Goldfinger as a teenager. The leading female role was a character named Pussy Galore. I remember thinking that I did not want to identify with her or be like her. I think many young guys did want to be like James Bond. I always liked strong, independent women characters. I recommend that if you are not knowledgeable about your history that you read up on it. When Women’s History courses were first introduced many feminists wanted them to be called “herstory.”
Bessie Coleman, First African American Woman Pilot
Shannon Lucid Astronaut 1978
Sally Ride Astronaut
Betty Friedan 1960
Susan B. Anthony 1855
Gloria Steinem 2011
Katherine Switzer Boston Marathon
Annette Kellerman Swimsuit she designed was considered indecent
Bella Abzug Congresswoman from New York 1970s
Amelia Earhart
Elizabeth Cady Stanton
Elizabeth Blackwell MD Stamp
Jacqueline Cochran Pioneer of Aviation
Patsy Mink Congresswoman from Hawaii
US Representative Barbara Jordan Texas 1973
Lucy Stone
Gloria Steinem on being a Playboy Bunny via You Tube by hudsonunionsociety:
I am sharing a post from Boomerly. I always like helpful easy suggestions for making my life less stressful. We all are already breathing and so it is easy to take up a practice of focusing on your breath during the day. It does help break the stress response because when you concentrate on just taking some deep breaths you can not think about whatever it is that is worrying you, at least for a few minutes. I have realized that often I am not taking relaxed breaths, but going through the day taking shallow breaths or sometimes holding my breath. I doubt that I am alone in this.
I have always liked coloring and playing with colors since I was a little girl. A way of bringing joy into our lives is doing things that we love. I recently used an Amazon gift card to buy myself two adult coloring books and a box of professional colored pencils. Amazon has a large selection of beautiful coloring books. You don’t have to be good at drawing because the pictures are already made. You get to color them however you chose. One of them I chose has Art Nouveau designs.
It is good to get into an activity that you enjoy and gets you into a relaxed, “flow” state. Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi who developed the concept and defines the flow state as ” an almost euphoric state of concentration and complete involvement. ” This is good for stress relief, and we all have to have some relaxation and happiness in our lives every day.
There are so many demands for our attention. It can feel like we are pretty scattered and pulled in all different directions. We need to be sure to schedule activities that connect us with ourselves and help focus our attention back to what speaks to us.
A creative activity that is enjoyable for you can add some happiness and relaxation to your day. It is a form of play. Do you make time in your day for some creative play? What do you do that gets you into the flow?
The image on my post is of Bette Davis and Gary Merrill in ” All About Eve.” This film was about a middle-aged actress being undermined by a younger, inexperienced competitor and how Hollywood treats “older” actresses.
We tell kids to “act your age” when we think they are acting immature and older people are sometimes told the same thing. What do we mean when we tell an older person to “act your age?”
I was very happy and humbled to see the response to my last post about Aging Disgracefully. The response made me realize that there are many people out there who are thinking about this issue.
One big reason why I do not like being told about “aging gracefully” is that I interpret it to be a prescription on how we should all behave and live our lives as we get older. And there are all these assumptions and expectations that come attached to that description of aging. Here is something from Huffington Post: “Want to Age Gracefully? Avoid these 7 Things,” with a photo of George Clooney and Sandra Bullock on the top. The suggestion being that if we want to look like these celebrities, who are obviously “aging gracefully,” we should read the following. And it seems the author thinks being in your 50s is the start of aging. Another post on the “Gen Fab” blog called ” Ageing Gracefully: What Exactly Does That Mean? ” has a photo of Sandra Bullock as Superwoman in the top photo. They asked women, a group of bloggers nearing and post 50, what they thought of “aging gracefully.” I liked the slideshow in the post a little better which includes some opinions of the bloggers.
Here’s another post from Huff/Post 50 today: “It’s Hard for Men to Believe I Feel Attractive at 50.” I almost skipped reading it with that title but she did have a few things to say I thought were positive about aging.
Another thing that bothers me is that much is written at older people and not by older people. I would much rather read about the personal journey than what someone thinks that journey should be. So I was happy to read what some of you shared about how you are living your lives.
How should we “act our age?” I don’t think we have to prove anything, like be a marathon runner, swim to Cuba, or take up aerobic yoga. To me it is a process of self-discovery. If we have been athletes all our lives we may still want to be athletes. But there are so many other things we can do. One reader said she is “creatively aging.” I am in the process of discovery myself. I have been working a little as a tutor and I am volunteering as a literacy tutor. I am blogging. 🙂 I want to start exploring other possible interests as well.
How do you envision your aging? How do you want to “act your age?”
FYI for the Introverts among us and those who love them The Quiet Revolution website is getting ready to launch soon.
I detest labels, stereotypes, and being put in a box. I have always been a bit of a rebel and will fight for your and my right to be different. Oh, how I hate conformity, how people are encouraged to march along in lock step, and never question anything. I hate group think. Pop think. Fads. Everyone following along with everyone else. This all being said, I really liked a post I read by Margaret Manning on her new site Boomerlycalled The Secret Life of Modern Grandmothers. I am not a grandmother yet but I am getting older and refuse to climb into a box , be labeled, and be expected to be any particular way that fits a stereotype of an older person.
I have read all these article about aging gracefully and I bristle. I want to be like the little girl who got her clean, frilly dress covered with mud, and ruined her party shoes. I borrowed the title of this post from Margaret’s post where she mentioned “aging disgracefully.”
Ageing gracefully is not for me. Another writer I follow, Ann Brenoff in the Huffington Post, wrote recently I’m Not Trying to Age Gracefully, So Don’t Pressure Me To. She makes some great points, that we all age differently. Some of us do need to dye our hair because we don’t look good with gray, and we all can’t look like your favorite celebrity, and some people have good genes so that’s why they look younger. She compares this pressure to “age gracefully” to “fat-shaming.”
I am for all of us, no matter what age, being our glorious, beautiful selves.
We need an infusion of joy and to pray for peace in the world. My prayer is that those making war will stop and consider peace. Here are some uplifting inspirations for those of us weary from all war.
From Matt Harding on You Tube:
And Som Sabadell flashmob Banco Sabadell:
I am sharing this post on Lindaghill for Stream Of Consciousness Saturday to say “No” to hopelessness, negativity and to the dream killers of the world. And say “Yes” to all the good in the world.
Irish Coffee was brought to San Francisco by one of its famous newspaper columnists, Stanton Delaplane. He had first tasted Irish Coffee at Shannon Airport and wanted to recreate the coffee. He collaborated with Jack Koeppler, then the owner of the Buena Vista Café, and with the help of the mayor of San Francisco, created the recipe for Irish Coffee in 1952. It is still served at the Buena Vista to this day.
