I need to reach deep into myself to gather my strength. Part of me wants to turn away, to hide. Is it a defense that automatically turns on to protect my heart from pain? But I feel I must bear witness, to see and hear what others are suffering, to honor their lives. I see you New York, New Jersey, Detroit, New Orleans, Georgia, Washington, my state of California, my country.
We must be in this together.
Stream of Consciousness Saturday, #SOCS, is hosted by Linda G Hill. The prompt word for today is ‘deep.’
We have the new directive from our government that we must extend ‘stay at home’ status to the end of April. Being an introvert I already spend more time at home than others and I am usually happy with doing so. But what makes this much less comfortable is the threat hanging over us and the sense that we do not know when it will end. In the near future, I feel dread about the predicted surge of cases and hospitalizations in California. Even if I am not infected myself I feel for other people’s suffering. And I am afraid for myself, my husband, children, grandson, and family getting infected. I don’t dwell on this fear but it is lurking below the surface. I feel tired and I think it is from the stress. Another thing is this constant message that older people are more vulnerable and will not do well if infected. I feel this can become a self-fulfilling prophecy. It does not bolster our immune systems to have this message of doom repeated over and over even though we should know we can’t take foolish risks either. I did survive cancer even though I was told the prognosis was not good. So I choose hope. I choose life. I choose that for all of us.
What Day Is It Anyway? #WDIIA, is a blogging community hosted by Linda G Hill.
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