Category Archives: Blogging Community

SOCS-Love is Just a Four Letter Word

I am not so pessimistic or cynical as this title, or the song it is based on, suggests. But reading the news lately about Ashley Madison ( and I hate that name and it does sound like it should be the name of a porn site), almost made me feel that way. Even more disillusioned with the state of humanity. Now I read that most of the women on the site either never used it or were faked. Then I thought some more about it and realized that the men who signed up for it could have done it because of…well I am not sure why they signed up for it…loneliness, sex addiction, pornography? I don’t want to make assumptions. Are they living evidence that confirms that “love is just a four letter word ?”

The angel voice of Joan Baez via CARLSFOLKCLUB:

But I do know that love means more than just a four letter word to many men. The men in my family and the husbands and partners of my friends for a start. So I want to put the other stuff out of my mind. I think I like the lyrics of this song better via countvonferson:

My contribution for: Stream of Consciosness Saturday

SOCS-Mind Meld

25 Replies

I love Star Trek and all the alien species who populate the series. Some of the aliens are the Klingons, the Vulcans and the Ferengi. I suspect some of our corporations and Wall Street may be run by Ferengi. The Ferengi think profit is supreme and they have several rules they live by called The Rules of Acquisition. One of these rules is never put family before business. Even though the Ferengi are pretty funny they are not my favorite characters.

One of my favorite characters is the Vulcan Mr. Spock. I was sad when the original actor,Leonard Nimoy, who played Spock recently passed. He was so great in the role I was skeptical, when the new Star Trek movies were coming out, that a new actor could fill the part as well. I think Zachary Quinto has done it. Something Spock was known for was “the Vulcan Mind Meld.” He employed it when other forms of communication failed or when he wanted to have a meeting of the minds with humans or other species.

Here are a few Mild Meld scenes via Russ Hany on You Tube entitled Don’t Forget Mind Meld:

Spock and another character Dr. McCoy were often at odds with each other. Dr. McCoy did not like that Spock was so unemotional and stubbornly logical. In the new Star Trek films the relationship continues the same.

Via Lostzilla 847 on You Tube:

And I can’t leave out the Klingons via Beau S :

This is my contribution to Stream of Consciousness Saturday

SOCS-Older Women Are Invisable

27 Replies

Most older women are not visible in modern media. Women who are aging naturally that is. We don’t see many older actresses and models. Women drop off the radar and start to disappear as they get older. Wouldn’t you like to know more about them? Wouldn’t you like to hear their stories? Who are they? According to Beauty Redefined , in their great post, they have been shunned by main stream media. They have been “symbolically annihilated.”

That sounds like science fiction. Something The Borg would say. “We are The Borg. You have been symbolically annihilated. Resistance is futile!” But looks like it is not science fiction. If you are an older woman you will not see yourself in popular magazine ads, in Hollywood films or on TV. Unless you have had a lot of “work done” to make you look much younger. There may be a few token older women on display but they are in the minority. Kind of like endangered species in the zoo.

Then there are all the negative messages for women about letting yourself look your natural age. Messages bombarding us about anti-wrinkle creams, botox, hair color, diets, and plastic surgery.

“What would happen if confident, happy, beautiful women decided to forego painful and expensive anti-aging procedures, breast lifts and enhancements, liposuction, all-over hair removal or tanning regimens? How could that change the way their daughters, students, friends, nieces and coworkers perceived themselves and their own “flawed,” lined, real faces? How could simply owning (and treating kindly and speaking nicely about) our so-called “imperfect” bodies affect not only our own lives, but those over whom we have influence? Is it possible to slowly but deliberately change the perception of these “flaws” as something to shame, hide and fix at any cost to something acceptable and embraceable in all their human, womanly real-ness?” (Beauty Redefined)

Yes what would happen? The “beauty” industry would self-destruct. I do like to be optimistic, enthusiastic, and hopeful about change. I think I can imagine the change beginning. I think I hear it. Robotic voice in background, “The self-destruct sequence is initiated….”

This is my contribution to Stream of Consciousness Saturday.

SOCS-Ready

25 Replies

Are you ready for this? I am ready as I’ll ever be. I answer this way when I am thinking of doing something pretty far outside of my comfort zone. It means I am ready to throw myself into something however not ready I may be. Things aren’t going to get any better so I may as well forge ahead. Face the fear and uncertainty and step out onto the stage.

One thing I am never ready for is being in a high place. Things like bungee jumping, sky diving or hiking along the edge of a high cliff. I know I could work on overcoming these fears but I am not ready yet.

A recurrent bad dream I have (thankfully not too often) is that I am walking along or toward the edge of a very, very high cliff and suddenly I am pulled to the edge and over it. I have this horrible feeling in my stomach and, oh no! , here I go over the edge and have the sensation of falling a long way down until….I end up in the ocean below.

I know I would not like going to the Grand Canyon and looking over the edge or riding one of those little donkeys down those narrow little, slippery paths to the floor of the canyon either. There is this Sky Walk platform that loops out from the edge of the canyon. It is clear plastic so you can see through your feet to all the way down below. Hey if we were meant to “sky walk” we would have wings right?

I think the trouble is I have a good imagination and I can imagine the donkey coming across a rattlesnake on the path ….or my donkey being kicked by another donkey ….or losing it’s footing and….if I ever rode one down I would have to look at that skinny little path and see how high up I was. You know how they tell you when you are climbing up a high mountain, “Don’t look down.” I could imagine that Sky Walk coming loose from its cantilevers or whatever is bolting it to the cliff and…or the walkway starts to crack under the weight of so many people…or someone bumps me over the rail and ….you get the idea.

Dangerous Cliff Edge

Sky Walk Grand Canyon

Sky Walk Aerial View

Me Calling for Help?

Notice that loose rock wall along the edge?

Pretty view

This outlook doesn’t look too scarey

This post is my contribution to Stream of Consciousness Saturday.

One Year Anniversary

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Dear Readers,

I received notification today that this is my One Year Anniversary with WordPress. I have learned a few things since I started and still have more things to learn. It has been great to meet other bloggers who have stayed my readers. I really appreciate it! I hope to continue to inspire you all to continue reading my posts and welcome others who may want to join in. 🙂

Love,

Deborah Drucker

Notes Tied On The Sagebrush

Making Connections the Introvert Way

17 Replies

We have all heard about how it is important to have social connections, important for our well-being. But making connections can be daunting for someone with an Introvert temperament. There needs to be a good fit. I have felt this in my own life when looking for outside interests. I did not see this issue addressed in any books or articles I had read other than to say how introverts can push themselves out and try to be more extroverted. Until I saw this post by Emily White.

In her post she talks about how she was made to leave an environment that had been ideally suited to her and move back to a big city. This was interesting to me because I have felt as she did about the city environment. I live near Los Angeles which definitely qualifies as a big city. What is daunting about such a big city is that there is so much of it and this can be a bit overwhelming. You have to really focus in and look around to find your niche in such a big place. It is like looking at a big cluttered room and trying to decide what to do first and where to begin. Ms. White gave me some food for thought and showed me that you can succeed in making connections as an introvert even in a big city. She doesn’t say we have to morph into an extrovert or do extroverted activities that involve things that introverts do not like such as making a lot of small talk or participating in groups. Unless the group is involved in a cause we are passionate about.

I really like that she is addressing this and discussing how she found connections that fit her. It is good to see posts like this because it gives support to people who want to make connections but want to feel comfortable doing so and do it in their own way.

Since I have started into a semi-retired stage, I have been looking for activities and projects that are engaging to me. I have done the usual book group at the library and I am doing volunteer and paid tutoring. My blog is something very new for me. I definitely was not into social media and I do think introverts approach social media differently from extroverts. I can get very overloaded with social media and the internet. So I am working at balancing my involvement. Which means limiting the time I spend on WordPress, Facebook and email. There must be time set aside for reflection and quiet pursuits.

Some views of Los Angeles, a very big city, and some parts of it that suit my interests, (not the crowded freeways).

Los Angeles from the air

405 Freeway Los Angeles

Griffith Park and Observatory

Hollywood Sign because I do love movies

Los Angeles Central Library

Mural Central Library

Dorothy Chandler Pavillion

LA County Museum of Natural History

El Matador Beach

Some new ideas

Topanga Canyon Trail

Me attempting photo from car near Ventura

Great Expectations and The Simple Life

12 Replies

I have read two great posts recently about how it is all right and even good to choose a simple life over a life that is publicly recognized and acclaimed as successful. We all hear so much about what it means to be a success, how to set goals, and not give up on our ambitions. If we haven’t fulfilled those goals and ambitions we can feel guilty and let down. Maybe we just didn’t try hard enough.

It was nice to read these posts about how it is possible to think that living a quieter life, without lofty goals, is perfectly fine. That there are people who have found the quiet life very rewarding and satisfying. The first post is by David Brooks, The Small, Happy Life. Brooks had asked readers to submit essays about how they found their purpose in life. He was surprised with some of the responses. He said, I expected most contributors would follow the commencement-speech clichés of our high-achieving culture: dream big; set ambitious goals; try to change the world. I will quote from one of the responses he received.

Terence J. Tollaksen responded:

“I have always admired those goal-oriented, stubborn, successful, determined individuals; they make things happen, and the world would be lost without them.” But, he explains, he has always had a “small font purpose.”

“I can say it worked for me. I know it sounds so Midwest, but it’s been wonderful. I have a terrific wife, 5 kids, friends from grade school and high school, college, army, friends locally, and sometimes, best of all, horses, dogs, and cats. Finally, I have a small industrial business that I started and have run for 40 years based on what I now identify as principles of ‘Pope Francis capitalism.’ ”

Oh, for more capitalists like Mr. Tollaksen!

The second post I read was Oh What to Be by Kelly Quirino. In it she describes what is was like for her to be an identified “gifted” child in elementary school at 5 years of age. How the high expectations of her teachers and community created so much stress for her. She would vomit every day before school. Her mother finally withdrew her from the gifted program. Kelly grew up to have a quiet life dedicated to her children. She says:

” I’m not a surgeon, a scientist, a CEO, or a Nobel Prize winner. What I want out of life is to live simply, honestly, and humbly. My ambitions are to show my children that they are loved and to make the world around me a little better, a little more beautiful, and a little more peaceful. In my heart, I feel like this is a worthy way to spend my time in this world.”

Kelly says she still feels guilty at times about her life choices. That she did not fulfill society’s expectations for someone with her abilities. Isn’t it time to redefine success or at least broaden the definition? Can’t there be more than one type of success? I agree we need all those goal-oriented people but we would be lost without all the quiet ones. And we have to allow each of us to chose which life fits us best.

SOCS-Clairvoyant

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Photographic image by Adolf de Meyer of Dolores

[Sotheby’s catalogue Feb. 2006] This photograph was reproduced in the May 1, 1919, issue of Vogue with the following caption: ‘Eager-eyed from under her bridal veil, she gazes in the fortune-telling crystal, hoping to see her dreams there in the clear yet mystery-filled glass. Fastening the draping veil of rose point lace are jeweled wings of platinum set solidly with diamonds and only Cartier could have devised the flexible setting.’

Clairvoyant

Clear sighted

Vision seeker

Crystal ball gazer

What do you see?

So long ago

Did your dreams come true?

|Stream of Consciousness|

Cherished Mementos

34 Replies

Some of things I cherish most are the memories I have of my children as they were growing up and the memorabilia from that time I have saved over the years. I have saved some of their art work, letters, cards, and little gifts from them when they were small. I know I have a large box in the garage containing samples of my kids’ art work and school papers. I could not bring myself to throw the stuff out. Many of these mementos from my children are inside my house as well. How can I say which one is most cherished. That seems unfair.

I often come across them when I am going through my dresser drawer, closets or armoire. They evoke memories of my kids at a certain age and feelings of such deep love and the poignancy of times passed and sometimes laughter.

Some of the things might be, a drawing, a hand-made Mother’s Day card, a note from my daughter saying she loves me, a letter from my son away at camp, a box of their baby clothes, the toy elephant I was given by a friend after my son was born that plays “You Are My Sunshine”, or my daughter’s first Mary Jane shoes. I can’t pick just one. Maybe this is why I can’t part with them either.

Some dispassionate person will have to decide the fate of these things after I am no longer of this world.

Baby dress, elephant, and Mary Jane shoes

Some cherished gifts

This is post is my contribution to Cherished Blogfest. You can read other great posts and link up to participate yourself. 🙂

SOCS-Butterflies are Free

8 Replies

Butterflies are Free is a film starring Goldie Hawn about a free spirited girl who lived in San Francisco. One day she sees a cute guy peering at her from a neighboring window while she is undressed. She thinks he is a peeping Tom and rushes next door to tell him off and realizes he is blind. I love the setting and era of this movie, (San Francisco in the 60s). Goldie helps the boy to overcome his fears and be independent and he helps her realize she has her own hang ups as well. I think this was Goldie Hawn’s first film and she is adorable.

Monarch butterflies migrate thousands of miles each year and during the Fall to late winter they end up in California. I always love to see butterflies outside. We get a few around my house. On my list is the idea of putting in plants that will attract butterflies, birds and bees.

Even though butterflies can fly thousands of miles, they couldn’t fly as far as the New Horizons space ship. I try to imagine what it is like on Pluto. There wouldn’t be any butterflies. Pluto is so far from the sun that it wouldn’t have daylight. Amazing that a planet so far away is still kept in orbit around the sun. Pluto has 5 moons but no oceans or people to be affected by their forces. If we had 5 moons how would our world be affected?

Pluto has been out there waiting for us to visit. We finally made it. We did a fly by, like a migrating butterfly, but we didn’t drop in yet.