Making Connections the Introvert Way

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We have all heard about how it is important to have social connections, important for our well-being. But making connections can be daunting for someone with an Introvert temperament. There needs to be a good fit. I have felt this in my own life when looking for outside interests. I did not see this issue addressed in any books or articles I had read other than to say how introverts can push themselves out and try to be more extroverted. Until I saw this post by Emily White.

In her post she talks about how she was made to leave an environment that had been ideally suited to her and move back to a big city. This was interesting to me because I have felt as she did about the city environment. I live near Los Angeles which definitely qualifies as a big city. What is daunting about such a big city is that there is so much of it and this can be a bit overwhelming. You have to really focus in and look around to find your niche in such a big place. It is like looking at a big cluttered room and trying to decide what to do first and where to begin. Ms. White gave me some food for thought and showed me that you can succeed in making connections as an introvert even in a big city. She doesn’t say we have to morph into an extrovert or do extroverted activities that involve things that introverts do not like such as making a lot of small talk or participating in groups. Unless the group is involved in a cause we are passionate about.

I really like that she is addressing this and discussing how she found connections that fit her. It is good to see posts like this because it gives support to people who want to make connections but want to feel comfortable doing so and do it in their own way.

Since I have started into a semi-retired stage, I have been looking for activities and projects that are engaging to me. I have done the usual book group at the library and I am doing volunteer and paid tutoring. My blog is something very new for me. I definitely was not into social media and I do think introverts approach social media differently from extroverts. I can get very overloaded with social media and the internet. So I am working at balancing my involvement. Which means limiting the time I spend on WordPress, Facebook and email. There must be time set aside for reflection and quiet pursuits.

Some views of Los Angeles, a very big city, and some parts of it that suit my interests, (not the crowded freeways).

Los Angeles from the air
405 Freeway Los Angeles
Griffith Park and Observatory
Hollywood Sign because I do love movies
Los Angeles Central Library
Mural Central Library
Dorothy Chandler Pavillion
LA County Museum of Natural History
El Matador Beach
Some new ideas
Topanga Canyon Trail
Me attempting photo from car near Ventura

17 thoughts on “Making Connections the Introvert Way”

  1. Dan Antion

    Thanks for sharing the photos Deborah, The aerial shot is amazing, the city is so vast. I look forward to the days when I can find some quiet time. It will likely come from the time I spend working today. I think that will bring a slowing to social media as well, as much of my presence there is tied to my job.

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  3. JoAnne

    Sometimes I think some social media connections, like Facebook, are easier for introverts like me, especially those of us who are visual. Emails and blogging can be overwhelming sometimes, then it’s imperative for me to get time in the forest or at the ocean, or simply in my backyard. I felt comforted reading this post.

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    1. Deborah Drucker Post author

      Yes when I am getting a lot of input it can get tiring. I am glad I do not have a job where I am met with an avalanche of email every day. Even now my email gets very full with messages from various sources. I need to take breaks as well and if I don’t I pay for it. Thank You for your comment. I am touched and humbled and glad you have found some comfort reading this post. That is what I hoped that others would feel, supported. 🙂

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  4. LifestyleswithLia

    Deborah, I really appreciate your honest and candid post here….And a big city indeed can prove to be daunting! (I enjoyed seeing the gorgeous pics of Los Angeles, by the way! I hope to return soon!)
    Your post made me think…I mostly consider myself an extrovert although I’ve been recognizing myself as more and more introverted as the years progress. I also have an introverted father and extroverted mother (I don’t necessarily want to put labels on them but I see it that way in them) so I can relate to both sides of the spectrum.
    Thank you again for sharing your thoughts, as well as Emily White’s, with us!
    All my very best,
    *Lia

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    1. Deborah Drucker Post author

      Thanks Lia. I took me a long time to understand my introvert traits. And you can be in the middle. It is a spectrum. No one is pure introvert. Thanks for reading and I always appreciate your comments as well. 🙂

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